I posted this here because you with toddlers might have faced this problem before. My 23 month old son and I live in an upstairs apartment and we got a new downstairs neighbor about 3 months ago. It started off with little comments from him when I saw him outside about “I can hear every drawer you open, every room you go in” and “I’m going to hear him (my son) until 9:30 tonight running around”. News flash: my son goes to bed at 8:30! haha Then it turned into over the last few days him banging on the ceiling when my son walked though the kitchen!!! Seriously he was just walking. Then last night at 7 pm he banged on the ceiling when my son ran, yes he actually ran, then showed up banging on my door telling me it sounded like a thunderstorm in his apartment. I can’t help that apparently the apartments don’t have much sound proofing because we HONESTLY aren’t hardly ever loud. I lived downstairs in my last apartment and I know what it sounds like so I try to be very cautious. The last people that lived in that apartment under me never complained. They actually said we were pretty quite especially compared to the last people that lived there. I won’t get onto my son for walking and I definately won’t tell him every five minutes to tip toe because the downstairs neighbor is an ass. I pussy foot around my apartment and have to stay gone most of the time due to this guy and I am really sick of it. What should I do? I am always trying to be considerate of my neighbors, I don’t run the dishwasher or washing machine before noon or after 6 even on the weekends and we don’t slam doors or yell or anything of the sort. This guy is home ALL day everyday and I can’t find a moment I don’t have to constantly worry if he is going to start banging on the ceiling or come upstairs complaining! Any advice would be great…thanks in advance!
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Sunday, April 11th, 2010 at 6:57 pm
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April 11th, 2010 at 7:41 pm
Tell him to get a job! J/K. I had problems with upstairs neighbors and after complaining to them a couple of times I went to the office (they were bad, more than the occasional kid running around or drawers/doors being heard). The only thing I can think of is to see if the apartments can move him elsewhere perhaps an upstairs apartment where he won’t have this problem. Maybe where there aren’t any kids directly near him. Hearing stuff from neighbors is just going to happen in apartments and if it the building isn’t built to be very sound proof that is not your fault. My oldest would jump around all day in one set of apartments and I never once had a complaint from the people downstairs (but they too had kids his age so maybe they were just more understanding, plus they worked so they were gone most the day). This guy just may never be happy. He sounds like a pretty cranky guy that has problems with everything.
April 11th, 2010 at 7:42 pm
Maybe you can talk to the Apt. Manager, maybe he/she has some resolutions for you. You shouldn’t have to live like that.
EDIT: The worst thing you can do is confront him or retailiate by being louder. You never know how “crazy’ he might get.
April 11th, 2010 at 8:21 pm
I feel your pain, I have been there. We lived in an upstairs apartment and a single woman lived below us. She obviously had a very quiet home because she lived alone and never had visitors. She worked night shift and had to sleep all day. Try telling your toddler they can’t run around normally. It is very unfair. We had been told by her that we more much more quiet than the couple before us (who threw parties all the time……even on her nights off) Still I found her giving me the cold shoulder and she did complain from time to time. It’s a hard situation because while you don’t want to aggravate your neighbor, you can’t constantly be yelling at your kids to be really quiet. They just don’t understand. I would use the awkwardness to help motivate you to save money and move into a different apartment or home when you can. Unfortunately even if you take the high road on this one (which it sounds like you already are) the problem won’t go away. At the same time you have to remember that it was this mans choice to move into an apartment that had an upstairs neighbor. Tough situation. Maybe try pointing it out to him as nicely as possible how considerate you try to be. You definitely don’t want neighbor wars. Been there. Not fun at all.
April 11th, 2010 at 8:46 pm
I’d tell him that if he’s so sensitive to noise he should only accept top floor apartments. Plain and simple there will always be noise even if it’s an 80 year old wheel chair bound granny you can find something to complain about.
Go to your apartment manager and let them know you are being unreasonably harassed, you don’t know this guy from from anybody he could be a violent explosion ready to happen. The problem is escalating next time you don’t want him beating the door down with a bat.
I sound like a paranoid nut. Oh, well better safe than sorry, good luck
April 11th, 2010 at 9:38 pm
You’re being too nice. Your son should be allowed to run in the house if you say so. If that noise is too much, too bad. Your son’s walking is probably very loud downstairs because he doesn’t have an adult-type step yet and is pounding the floor with his feet. Also, he probably walks faster. Adults walk softer and slower because we have more weight to move around and most of us have worn out a few joints and we can’t bounce around like kids any more!
Try treating your neighbor like a toddler screaming over nothing. Ignore him when he pounds on the ceiling. Don’t change your behavior in response to the pounding. When he knocks on the door, give him a non-answer, “I’m sorry that you’re bothered,” and quickly close the door on him. At first he’ll increase the behavior, then when he sees it does nothing, he’ll either stop or complain to the apartment manager. It’s his problem, so he should take the effort to complain. I doubt the complaint to the manager will get him anything because there’s nothing to be done. He knowingly rented a downstairs apartment.
You and your son are doing nothing wrong, so stop feeling guilty!
April 11th, 2010 at 10:15 pm
the only thing I can recommend is placing a few mats/rugs around to soften the noise and tell your landlord about it.
April 11th, 2010 at 10:30 pm
blast barry manilow music night and day…that will show him.
April 11th, 2010 at 11:17 pm
Talk to your landlord. If you have a good rap and pay your rent on time every month, then your landlord will probably be a bit more on your side. Maybe try to have a couple other neighbors testify that you are a polite and quiet neighbor, and maybe your landlord will see what a jerk this guy is. This new neighbor has nothing on you so don’t worry.
April 11th, 2010 at 11:36 pm
First you need to talk to your landlord. Report this guy as harassing you, pronto. Next time this guy gets smart with you let him know you aren’t going to be pushed around. Start with “Listen @sshole, I was here way before you, if you don’t like the living conditions move.” He’s trying to intimidate you, don’t let him. Next time he starts banging on the ceiling start jumping up and down on the floor. He sounds like he likes to push women around, you need to let him know you aren’t his new toy.
April 11th, 2010 at 11:58 pm
Sounds like this guy is a idiot.Tell him you know when your child walks across the floor, you don’t need a report from him.Talk to your landlord about him bagging on your floor scaring your son.If you are good neighbors to everyone else, I’m sure they will stick up for you.Enjoy your baby and don’t worry about that creep.If he doesn’t want to hear noise he should move out.